Thursday, September 13, 2018

Retro Taco Was Neither Retro, Nor Tacos.

Y'ALL..... I'm back! Like you care, I know.
Oh, and before I start, shout out to the cutie, blonde bartender named 'Cricket'?. She was the best part of the whole experience. Now there's some foreshadowing for ya! LOL!
Maybe this restaurant has a lot to offer, unfortunately I wasn't the one to find it in the way of food. Ya win some, you lose some, 'amirite?
It was cool looking when I pulled up, and great when I walked in. I met a friend for Taco Tuesday and thought I would just try 100 things on the menu and really gorge myself after a long day at my new office gig. And, naturally since I like to keep my thighs soft & thick; I ordered a lot of food to try.
I started off with the street corn, fried pickle spears, retro wings and the carnitas taco with sauteed onions. Then, followed it up with the B&C burrito and a side of the mac & cheese, (Because let's face it, if mac & cheese is on the menu, i'm going to order it.) How can I put this nicely, and not say that I have had better food at a gas station? Was that too harsh? Please remember I have eaten at some really yummy gas stations, too bad this wasn't one of them.
So, firstly, all the food all came out cold, which is my #1 red flag for, "Your food was cooked and then sat around long enough to get cold". Ooof! Secondly, the wings were baked and definitely pre-frozen. BARF!!!!!! This should be illegal and someone needs to be smacked around for NOT putting that on the menu. How Rude! The carnitas taco had no flavor and was so soaking wet, it actually  soaked through BOTH of the corn tortillas, making the whole situation barely edible and extra messy- not in a good way. The street corn was by far the best tasting out of everything I ordered, but that was due to the fact that it had so much cayenne pepper sprinkled on the outside that I was excited for some kind of flavor, if you can even call it that. The B&C burrito was by far the most terrible burrito I have ever eaten in my life. I know, it's a bold statement, but I stand by it. The black beans were wet and cold and topped with cold shredded colby-jack  cheese and large chunks of uncooked white onion, on a cold, 3/4 wrapped tortilla shell. Please remember, I only speak the truth, and my undying love for raw white onion didn't have the ability to rectify the rest of the situation at hand. Now, the coups de grace.. the mac & cheese. Blue Box Kraft. Seriously. Cold, dry, and probably cooked yesterday. Needless to say, it was gross and sad and kinda ruined my undying fat kid love for Blue Box Kraft mac & cheese. My friend ordered the chips & queso, tostata, shrimp taco and moonshine bbq taco. No love could be reported on anything but the chips and queso.
That is all. RANT OVER!
Also, when my friend ordered a Modello to drink, they didn't even open it. UGH!!!
Save your time, gas money and taste buds. Taco Tuesday will resume at it's normally scheduled time next week, but certainly not back here.
Colleen's yummy food rating: 1/5
You're on your own if you try this place.